Do it Anyway

I am a competitive person, and I was faced with a big challenge this past weekend: a half-marathon ROW.  Yes, you read that right… 21.1km on an erg.

You see, the Crossfit Games took place last weekend in California, and competitors were surprised with this endurance challenge two days before their three-day competition was to begin.  The buzz around my gym soon changed from ‘wasn’t that workout announcement crazy?’ to ‘do you want to give that a try?’.  Seven of us took the bait.

The calm before the storm...

The calm before the storm.

I signed myself up last Thursday morning for Sunday’s morning’s event.  That meant I had three full days to think about things.  And worry about things.  And worry, I did.

I worried about being undertrained.  I worried about not being able to finish.  I worried about what people would think if I quit.  I worried about the pain.  I worried about the blisters my hands would get.  I worried about the mental stamina this would require.  My worry brewed from lying just under the surface to full-on bubbling over on Saturday night- I packed and re-packed my gym bag three times, I set two alarms, and I paced footprints into the carpet in my hall.  Then this conversation happened:

  • Husband:  Why are you so nervous?
  • Me:  I’m nervous about tomorrow.  What if I don’t finish?  What will people think?
  • Husband: Who cares?  At least you tried.

Huh.  That’s true, and that pretty much sums it up.  At least I tried.  After all, if you don’t push your limits, then you’ll never know what those limits are.

I was scared, I felt pressure, I feared judgement, and I did it anyway.  The thing is, pressure is a perceived emotion.  And so is judgement.  You can only feel pressure if you perceive it that way, and you can only feel judgement if you allow it.

Don’t perceive it that way.  Don’t allow it.

Do it anyway.

Evidence! Not sure why the date says August 22- I can assure you I will not be doing this again on August 22!

Evidence!
Not sure why the date says Aug 22-
I can assure you I will not be doing this again on Aug 22!


148 hours per week

I work part-time, about 20 hours per week.  Right now, at this stage in my life, that’s about all I can handle.  But what do I do with the other 148 hours per week?

I am a parent.

I wipe children’s faces and noses and bums.  I’ve caught spit-up with my hand and pee with my t-shirt.

I don’t go to the bathroom alone or shower in peace.  If little hands are not reaching to be picked up, they are wiggling fingers underneath the door or rattling the knob to get in.

I rarely sit down, and when I do, it’s usually to make a grocery list or fold laundry or do some online banking.  I wake up at 5:30 to have some gym time and I go to bed late so that I can have some couch time.

I prepare three meals and many snacks every day.  I rarely get to enjoy my food hot.  I dole out vitamins and prunes and fish oil.  I clean up the table, I wipe down the highchair, and my dishwasher is always full.

I put shoes on six feet in the morning, hats on three heads, and sunscreen on twelve limbs.  I can pack a diaper bag in two minutes flat while carrying a baby in my arms.  I can leash the dog, open the garage door, and unfold the stroller while simultaneously tracking down keys and bringing in the newspaper.

I take my kids to swimming lessons and skating lessons, playgrounds and playgroups, library programs and parks.  I get their teeth checked, their eyes checked, their spines checked, and I get them weighed and measured.  I teach them about manners and sharing and taking turns.  I teach them to play gently with the dog.

I make sure they’re hydrated, fed, and rested.  I make sure they’re getting enough exercise and fresh air, and not too much screen time.  I keep their 20 fingernails trimmed and their 20 toenails clean.  I brush their hair and their teeth and help tidy their rooms.

I read countless books and play countless hours in the playroom.  I walk miles through wood-chipped trails and point out the birds and the trees and the squirrels.  I smile when my daughter points out every airplane that flies overhead and my son gets excited at every big truck that we see.

I practice the alphabet and numbers, I sing songs and make up rhymes, and I tell more stories than you can imagine.  I take pictures often and videos sporadically, and I write down their milestones in a baby book.

I am also a wife, a daughter, a daughter-in-law, a sister, a niece, a cousin, and a friend.  I’m a chiropractor, a runner, a Crossfitter, and a foodie.  I love travelling and reading and coffee and chocolate.  I love being outside, getting up early, and taking naps.  I’m organized and loyal, a perfectionist, and a to-do-lister.  But to my kids, I am a mom. 

IMG_0743

On an adventure at Bronte Park.


How Come She Seems So Little?

***This post was originally written as a Guest Blog post for Momstown.ca.

Every child is different, aren’t they?  Every parenting experience unique.  Every milestone individual.  So why am I surprised that being a parent the second time around is so different than the first?

Pooh quote 2

My kids are just over three years apart; thirty-seven months to be exact.  My son is now four-and-a-half, my daughter sixteen months.  You would think I’d be getting used to this motherhood gig.  And yet every stage along the way makes me stop and think.

How come she seems so little when he seemed so big at this age?  

I was always looking ahead with him- to a time when he could roll over, then sit up, then crawl, then walk.  I was excited to see what the next stage brought, while trying to appreciate the present one.  It’s the opposite with her.  I want her to stay my baby forever.

How come I don’t feel like I know her as well as I do him?

Is it simply that he’s older, and therefore his personality has had more time to develop?  Or is it that I haven’t spent as much one-on-one time with her?  But what the second-born lacks in individual time, they gain in sibling interaction.

How come things aren’t such a big deal this time around?

The big stuff is still a big deal- her accomplishments, her growth, her celebrations.  But the small stuff is not a big deal- she gets woken up from naps if we need to be somewhere, she wears dirty clothes on occasion, and she’s eaten lots of sand.

She’s likely my last baby, and I’m soaking her up.  My experience has grown, my haste has shrunk, and my perception has changed.