What Cancer Cannot Do

2 Comments May 19, 2015 drworobec

The world lost a fighter on Sunday.

That fighter’s name was Jen Young, or JY, as she’s known. She was a member of Crossfit Altitude, the gym I’ve been a part of for more than five years; if you know anything about CrossFit, you’ll know that we’re a tight-knit bunch. And while JY and I weren’t close friends, I have certainly admired the battle she’s waged over the past year and a half. In her case, the cancer began as cervical cancer and metastasized to her liver. She was 31 years old.

I’ve written about her a couple of times here and there, but now I’m going to share her education and advice, in her own remarkable, touching, transparently honest words, courtesy of her blog ‘From Potato to Paleo.’

How she was initially diagnosed:

“One of the first things people seem to ask me is how I found out. Since cervical cancer is one of the most preventable and can often be detected earlier than most, I don’t mind sharing. In May I went for my regular annual physical, and the doctor did not see anything abnormal. I did not get a pap at this time, because paps are only every 3 years now and I had had a normal one the year before. In principle, I am very much against this change in policy, but my particular cancer tends not to show up in paps in the pre-cancerous “abnormal cell” stage like many others do, so it likely would not have made a difference in my case. In June/July I noticed bleeding outside of my cycle that seemed different. I went to the doctor again in August and asked for a pap and exam. She could see the tumor, and sent me to the gynocologist right away for a biopsy. The gynocologist took one, but was convinced it was just a fibroid given its rapid appearance; most cervical cancers grow much more slowly than my mutant variety (aren’t I just the overachiever). Obviously she was incorrect, although I’m not in the least bit upset with her. I would rather have spent that week believing it was no big deal than all stressed about it waiting for results.”

Her take on fear and inspiration:

“I’m not inspiring. I’m just terrified, and too proud to show it…. That said, you needn’t feel bad every time you talk to me about some aspect of life, yours or mine, that is not cancer related. Just because you didn’t feel terrified at any point today doesn’t mean that you don’t have problems. Having cancer didn’t make me suddenly immune to “ordinary” problems. I still get unreasonably angry at old people in parking lots and irritable with poor customer service. Problems are relative in the life experience, and I am not judging yours.”

Her advice:

“1. Smile more”.

“1b. Do things that make other people smile”.

“2. Pay attention”.

“3. Trust the universe”.

JY also co-founded the Love the Snatch Foundation while fighting her courageous battle. LtS goals include fundraising, cervical cancer awareness, open conversation, and promoting/supporting wellness through health and fitness. If you’re inclined and able, please consider donating here.

Lastly, have a read of this image that’s been floating around the internet. “It cannot conquer the spirit“.

What-Cancer-Cannot-Do

RIP JY.

The Key Jar

2 Comments May 12, 2015 drworobec

I hope that you had a Happy Mother’s Day weekend, as I did. There was lots of family time in the sunshine for us, and that suits me just perfectly. I’m not at all about gifts and commercialism, in case you missed my ‘Gifts, and gifts, and gifts, oh my‘ post from awhile back. I’m about thoughtfulness, and experiences, and time together; but I’d like to share the knock-your-socks-off present that made my day, and perhaps my year… cue the melodrama.

My children, who are now six and three, came home from Kindergarten and Preschool with handmade loveliness in the form of decorated flower pots, butterfly canvases, and Mother’s Day cards. My husband added a sleep-in (I made it to 8:45am!), some fresh cut flowers (my fave!), and a homemade Whole30-approved brunch (today is Day 12 of my first Whole30, if you happen to be following along). Brilliant. I was a happy girl. And then they gave me this:

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This is a key jar. The premise is simple: the jar is filled with questions- thoughtful, exploratory, insightful questions. At family meals, we pull a ‘key’ from the jar and it unlocks beautiful conversation from our children’s hearts and minds.

But as wonderful as my husband is, and he really is wonderful, he did not come up with the key jar idea. In fact, it is a brainchild from the Momastery website, written by Glennon Doyle Melton. She writes:

“Getting to know ourselves and others is the greatest adventure. We are explorers of ourselves and the people we love. Love is the ongoing process of unlocking each other and keeping safe whatever we find. Thoughtful questions are the keys we use to do the unlocking and safekeeping.”

Here’s my (unsolicited) advice:

If you have a child, you need a key jar.
If you know a child, you need to give them a key jar.
If you have a key jar, you need to treasure what it unlocks.

To make your very own, please find instructions by clicking here.

Happy Tuesday, my friends.

The World Needs More Girlfriends

2 Comments April 14, 2015 drworobec

This one is written with my female readers in mind. Not that men don’t need/value friendship as much as women, but I’m writing from a place of personal experience, and that experience comes from a female background.

The world needs more girlfriends. I was in my car this morning, running around amongst school drop-offs and library pickups and patient appointments, and this statement rang out in my brain like a bell. The world needs more girlfriends. More specifically, we all need more girlfriends. More connection. More support. More friendship. In fact, I had a different blog post all polished up and ready to go today; but this statement came so quickly and so clearly, that I felt it needed some attention. The world needs more girlfriends.

I’ve always been lucky enough to have a large circle of friends. I moved from small-town Alberta to bigger small-town Alberta when I was ten years old, and one of my most vivid memories of early childhood is the ‘going-away’ party that was held for me when we moved- it included sitting around in a circle of my closest girlfriends, crying, listening to ‘Every Rose Has its Thorn.’ Quite the visual, right? And it’s no secret that my Junior High and High School experience centred around my friend Sarah, who’s still my foundation, 25 years later. My University days brought me my other sounding board, Shannon, and our friendship has spanned the distance of miles and time changes. And CMCC, the four-year all-in-or-all-out program that uprooted my life and moved me across the country, gave me friendships that I lean on daily.

Lifelong friends.

So when I moved to Burlington in 2004, and then finished school in 2006, it was the first time in my life when I found myself not surrounded by girlfriends who knew me; the real, authentic me. I was starting my practice, living in a city that didn’t feel like home, and my closest friends were a phone call and a plane ride away. I remember lamenting to my husband that I felt lonely and isolated, and I just needed more friends….

The world needs more girlfriends. And I found some. I grew roots. I met people. I built my practice, I joined a running club, I started CrossFit, I moved to a new neighbourhood, and my circle began to expand. Now I have those go-for-coffee friends that I so longed for ten years ago. I have those come-over-in-my-sweatpants friends and those listening-ear friends, those go-for-a-walk friends and those can-you-do-me-a-favour friends.

And yes, I still have all those friends I mentioned at the start, who are still a phone call and a plane ride away. And they mean the world to me too.

xo.