The Shoulds

***This post was originally written as a Guest Blog post for Momstown.ca.***

I’ve recently been corresponding with another female chiropractor, whom I worked with long, long ago…. I mean, before-I-was-even-a-chiro long ago.  She has just had her first baby, and now she’s trying to navigate the challenge that is being a working mom.

“Often it feels a lot like you should be able to manage it all,” she said in a recent email.  And that, my friends, sums up the motherhood condition known as “The Shoulds”.

  • I should be able to work as much as I used to.
  • I should be able to wear my pre-pregnancy clothes.
  • I should be able to smile and laugh and play with my baby all day.
  • I should be able to get up early.
  • I should be able to keep my house clean.
  • I should be able to do it all.

Guess what mamas?  You can’t.  Motherhood is an all-consuming, priority-shifting, time-altering new reality.  So, what’s a girl to do?  Well, you have to choose what’s going to change.  You can choose sleep or fitness or work or socializing or housework or….. see what I mean?  There are simply not enough hours in the day to do it all, always.  My choice is less sleep (okay, far less sleep), part-time work, and a perpetually dirty kitchen floor; it wouldn’t have worked for the childless me, but it works for the mama in me.  And I’m slowly recovering from “The Shoulds”.

My motherhood experience began on January 22nd, 2009.

My motherhood experience began on Jan 22nd, 2009.

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2 thoughts on “The Shoulds

  1. Allison McMillin Jelley says:

    Love this! So true. Thank you for writing it.

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