***This post was originally written as a Guest Blog post for Momstown.ca.***
I’ve recently been corresponding with another female chiropractor, whom I worked with long, long ago…. I mean, before-I-was-even-a-chiro long ago. She has just had her first baby, and now she’s trying to navigate the challenge that is being a working mom.
“Often it feels a lot like you should be able to manage it all,” she said in a recent email. And that, my friends, sums up the motherhood condition known as “The Shoulds”.
- I should be able to work as much as I used to.
- I should be able to wear my pre-pregnancy clothes.
- I should be able to smile and laugh and play with my baby all day.
- I should be able to get up early.
- I should be able to keep my house clean.
- I should be able to do it all.
Guess what mamas? You can’t. Motherhood is an all-consuming, priority-shifting, time-altering new reality. So, what’s a girl to do? Well, you have to choose what’s going to change. You can choose sleep or fitness or work or socializing or housework or….. see what I mean? There are simply not enough hours in the day to do it all, always. My choice is less sleep (okay, far less sleep), part-time work, and a perpetually dirty kitchen floor; it wouldn’t have worked for the childless me, but it works for the mama in me. And I’m slowly recovering from “The Shoulds”.